


Fester's Fun

by caz251



Series: Creepy Kooky Spooky...Torchwood [34]
Category: Addams Family - All Media Types, Torchwood
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-07-05
Updated: 2019-03-31
Packaged: 2019-06-05 22:33:47
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 6,361
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15180809
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/caz251/pseuds/caz251
Summary: After getting himself some transport Fester decides to liven up the streets of Cardiff by proposing a game.





	1. Fester's Game

**Author's Note:**

> This spawned from a little bunny of Fester in a silver sports car that wouldn't leave me alone after seeing a family friend who used to do Fester impressions in his silver sports car :)
> 
> Not sure how long this is going to become, probably a series of smaller chapters, or how frequent they will be, but it is sooo good to be writing in this verse again.

Fester Addams was enjoying his time in Wales; the weather in Cardiff was just so dreary it was perfect. Spending time with their Welsh relations was also interesting, and getting to play around with some of the things in the Torchwood Archives was an adventure. His experiments with the corpse that was to become his nephew were riveting, he was sure that they would come up with some of the best formulas for preserving things, even though the young corpse wasn’t destined to stay that way for long. They just had to make sure that he was preserved enough until the wedding and then if Death was to be believed the corpse would become more alive than dead, although he would still be bound to Death quite strongly.

Owen had quite the amount of darkness in him that would allow him to fit in quite well with their family and Grandmamma had approved of him, so Fester felt that it was okay to forge a similar relationship with the corpse as he had forged with Johnny many years ago. Owen did like the finer things in life though, and Fester was sure that would no doubt cause a few differences in opinion between him and his future bride, but the young man seemed to have realised this.

It wasn’t to say that Wednesday didn’t like the finer things in life it was just her style and the flashy gaudiness that Owen had often hid himself behind weren’t to the same taste. Wednesday would rather have a classic hearse like the one Lurch drove them around in, in top condition of course, than a flashy sports car that Owen owned. Owen wasn’t going to be a pushover Fester could see that, but the man had also realised that there were some battles that he wasn’t going to win, and getting Wednesday as a passenger in his silver sports car that he had bought after his last disastrous relationship.

Fester had seen an opening there, a weakness to exploit in the younger man, and he took it. While family was the most important thing to an Addams it didn’t mean that there was never any rivalry within the family, or one-upmanship amongst them. If Owen was going to allow himself to be taken advantage of he would need to learn to toughen up, or Wednesday would completely eat him alive. Fester had made the deal of the century, offering to help Owen select a car that would be acceptable with his niece’s tastes and take his convertible off his hands. Owen had agreed without bargaining for a price for the car, so Fester had gotten the car for the price of a bit of advice on Wednesday’s taste in vehicles. 

Driving through the streets of Cardiff, his duffle coat buttoned fully; with the roof down on his car the rain pelting off the seats Fester had a grin on his face. He was enjoying the strange looks he was getting from the pedestrians he drove passed; he wondered how the general population of Cardiff would react with some of the more in your face members of the Addams family living in their city. It would be interesting to see some of the reactions, he wondered who would get the most severe reactions during their time there.

Reaching the estate he drove through the gates that had creaked open unaided upon his approach he made his way up the drive parking his new car. He put the roof up before getting out, there was no use the car getting more wet if he wasn’t in it, and at least with the roof up it may start to attain a lovely damp odour. 

As he made his way inside he started to think on the betting pool or competition he wanted to start. “Who wants a game of Scare the Natives?” Fester crowed to the entry hall of the manor and waited for various members of the family to appear from their previous activities.

“Terms.” Wednesday asked, a bloodthirsty smirk on her face, a mace in her dominant hand.

“No permanent harm.” Fester, half stated half checked with the rest of the assembled family. “No permanent harm and no getting arrested.”

There were a few grumbles at the rules, but Fester didn’t want to be the one that Tharmus made do all the paperwork for the various family members release from police custody. Most of the family scattered to prepare for the game whilst Fester pulled out a little black book and looked at those who remained.

“Bets.” He asked and waited for them to give him their predictions for the outcome of the game.


	2. Pugsley's Plan

Pugsley knew exactly how he could scare the natives, unfortunately he knew that taking Janet and Blossom on a walk through Cardiff City Centre was out of the question. His girls were happily settled now on Flat Holm Island and Tharmus would come up with some pretty creative punishments if he just casually took a couple of aliens for a stroll through town on a Saturday afternoon.

With Plan A being out of the question he fell back on old habits, after all if in doubt blow it up.  While he wanted to scare the natives permanent harm to those who had done nothing to the family was not something that he was interested in. A little physical damage to the city though, well that was just a hazard of the game, collateral damage.

He had the perfect target as well for his little explosions. To say that Aluka’s wife was irritating was an understatement, she had no respect for his family or their traditions, and she would see them all eradicated or lock up if she could get any backing to do so. Unluckily for her, their family had deep ties with the right people and any attempt to move against them would be known to the family pretty quickly, and she would not like how they dealt with threats. Fortunately for her she wasn’t a threat to the family, or she hadn’t become one yet at least, for now she was just an annoyance, like a fly that Pugsley was itching to swat.

It was all too easy to set up, rigging her car was child’s play, and getting her car keys even easier. He had just lifted them from where she threw them on her arrival home. He knew that she wasn’t impressed to see him in her flat, but she became a bit less wary of him when Aluka informed her that they were watching the rugby. Pugsley found it rather amusing that she suddenly seemed to believe his level of threat to her was lessened just because he was doing something that she classified as ‘normal’.

To be polite, he had told her, he nipped outside to smoke rather than smoking inside their flat. What he was really doing was rigging her car up to explode. He didn’t want the explosion to go off too early or somewhere boring so he had rigged it to go off based on the locking of her car, knowing that the next time she automatically locked her car would be when she went to work. Pugsley knew that she had a habit of parking wherever she felt like, having heard complain about all the parking tickets she kept getting for parking on the Plass.

A car exploding outside the Millennium Centre was sure to scare the natives, and the only arrest that may come of it would be Aluka’s wife, which he was sure none of the family would mind very much and only slightly bent the rules of the game.


	3. Ianto's Interlude

Ianto Tharmus Addams Jones was well aware of the game that his family were playing, and he wasn’t intending to interfere unless they did something that could interfere with the workings of Torchwood as an organisation or with his and Jack’s relationship. He had already vetoed several plots and schemes he had heard about aliens in the city centre. He had explained to Jack about the families game and bet and he was surprised to find that Jack was completely amused by the game and he had a feeling that he was going to try and throw his hat into the ring.

Ianto came out of his thoughts to the sound of Lockdown procedures initiating, he looked quickly to Toshiko knowing that if she hadn’t set the Lockdown she would be already hunting out the reason for it.

“It was me.” She called out, “Bomb threat called into the police for the Plass. I need to initiate a Lockdown to get the shielding I have been working on to come online, I haven’t managed to isolate it to work independent of the Lockdown yet.”

Jack who had appeared from his office when the lockdown initiated sighed loudly, “A credible threat? Or do we think it’s a hoax?”

Toshiko just glared at him as if she hadn’t thought to verify that. “Someone reported a woman with a bomb in her car screaming and shouting in a line of traffic about getting to the Plass. It sounds suspicious, the caller wanted to remain anonymous as well. The police are certainly taking it seriously, and I am not taking any chances. This is a human threat, nothing alien in nature about it and we have too much technology down here to risk a massive hole in the ceiling. From what I got from the police we have about five minutes.”

“Lower levels guys, just in case.” Jack called out, making sure Owen could hear him in his domain. “Ianto can you tempt Myfanwy down.”

Everyone started to scramble to get out of what could potentially be part of the blast zone. Toshiko grabbed her laptop and her handbag, immediately beginning to fill her bag with tech lying around she may need. Owen came out of the med bay a large field med pack slung over his shoulder, Wednesday following behind him carrying a second rucksack. No-one even commented on her being there as Ianto let out a sharp whistle to call down their resident pterodactyl as he made his way to the kitchenette. He grabbed the emergency backpack he had stashed in there and a large bar of dark chocolate to tempt Myfanwy with. This took less than two minutes and Jack was leading them down to the lower levels and into Ianto’s domain.

They set Tosh up at Ianto’s desk as quickly as they could so that she could try to keep them in the loop, or as much as she could in their self imposed lockdown. On Ianto’s computer she had the CCTV of the Plass up, watching as the police seemed to take control of the area, diverting as many people away from the area as they could. She was also using it to try and monitor the police radio chatter to hear what was happening. Her own laptop was displaying the coding for the shielding that was implemented with lockdown, she was staring at the lines of code avidly, looking to see any discrepancies in what she thought in the programming.

It was only when Ianto began to make coffee for them with the small coffee pot he kept in the archives did anyone realised that Gwen was not with them.

“She’s late as usual.” Owen griped, “Probably still asleep knowing her. Should be interesting watching her trying to get in though.”

“She won’t get through the police.” Toshiko informed them. “They have scrambled quickly, all the anti-terrorism training seems to have paid off for them. They are blocking access to the area, and taking a particular interest in anyone who seems to have a disinterest in taking another route. Bomb squad are a few minutes out, the plan is to search the area in case a bomb has already been placed.”

“Nah, that’s not going to work with Gwen though.” Owen explained, “If she arrives during this she will either try to take command of that lot or force her way through them using her Torchwood ID.”

It wasn’t long before Owen’s predictions were proven true, Gwen driving right up to the Plass through the police, and Ianto sighed as she parked right on the Plass. “Gwen pays all her own parking fines from now on, and deals with the paperwork for them. I’ve told her too many times to count not to park there.”

Whatever Jack’s response would have been was muffled by the sound of the small explosion from above them through the CCTV. They didn’t actually feel anything or hear it down in the archives and Ianto hoped that the hub had no damage in the upper levels.

“Gwen’s car was the bomb.” Toshiko spoke softly, unable to tear her eyes away from Ianto’s computer, watching as events unfolded. There didn’t seem to be any damage to the area, the bomb couldn’t have been very big as it only really affected the car. Gwen had been blasted back away from the car and was now being dragged away from the wreckage by two police officers, one of them cuffing her even as they pulled her from the immediate vicinity of her burnt out car.

Ianto and Wednesday shared a quick look, unnoticed by any of the others knowing immediately who was responsible now. While a bomb threat was often enough to scare the population in some places, those in Cardiff were made of stronger stuff and it would take more than a car bomb to scare them. Pugsley hadn’t won this time round, but he had just got himself some work to do. Ianto was definitely not cleaning up this one, Pugsley could do all the leg work on this one convincing the police that it was a training exercise and getting Gwen out of custody, after all Ianto doubted that his cousin would be impressed that his wife was locked up as a terrorist as a result of a family game.


	4. Pugsley's  Penance

Pugsley rewatched the news report with a small sinister grin on his face. The report had done more to scare the natives than his little explosion had, it was just a shame that it had later been followed up with a report that the “terrorist activity” was actually a training exercise to assess the response times of the emergency services.

Pugsley had not been impressed when Tharmus had insisted that he take steps to fix the situation. He hadn’t much cared that Gwen was his cousins’ wife and would be held as a terrorist, although he had pointed out that Aluka might be annoyed at that. No it had been that Gwen was a member of Torchwood and it could impact on the organisation. Pugsley had argued that it was the perfect opportunity to get rid of her, from both the family and the organisation. Tharmus would not be swayed however so Pugsley had to spend several hours working to make people believe that the small explosion that Gwen’s car became was nothing but a training exercise.

It wasn’t actually that difficult for him to do using the ID he kept on him at all times made it an easy task. Identifying himself as a member of the elusive MI9, a select group of individuals hidden within other branches of the government, meant that his explanations were listened to and believed. The corroborating evidence that his cousin had put together for him helped as well. 

MI9 was the designation that had been given to the Addamses by Queen Victoria not long after she had founded Torchwood. She had been approached not long after the incident at Torchwood House by a group of the family attempting to secure some sort of working agreement between them. The Addams family, while human, were a bit too close in some cases to the line and had no intention of ending up in a cell or under a scalpel, unless they had chosen that entertainment for themselves. It had been his many times great aunt Clymestra, a seer, who had come up with the designation suggestion, probably to tie in with the agencies that would exist later in her visions.

Convincing the police that Gwen was not actually a terrorist was surprisingly easy, even without his supporting documentation. Those who had worked with her previously were aware of her lack of any real intelligence. They knew that it was highly unlikely that someone of her limited skills and talents would have been able to make a bomb. Explaining why he had used her as the delivery method of the exercise took a little longer.

He passed it off as teaching her a lesson for her constant parking violations, as well as making the police realise the potential weaknesses in their defences. They should never allowed Gwen through their cordons, but they had done so because of her supposed seniority over them. They were dealing with something that was definitely not a Torchwood matter, and even if it had been Gwen was only a junior member of the organisation on her own and definitely not sanctioned by her superiors to interfere or get involved with the situation.

It didn’t take much persuading after that to convince them to continue to hold on to Gwen for a bit longer. It was the only small victory Pugsley got from the situation, the idea of Gwen being stuck in a cell for a bit longer. He certainly hadn’t done well enough to come out on top in the game, maybe Wednesday would do better then he had.


	5. Gwen's Grumbling

Gwen was having a lousy day, she had woken up late and was completely hung-over. Her husband’s cousin had invaded her home the evening before to watch the rugby and his presence had meant that she had needed a drink of the alcoholic variety. After several cans of Brains she had stumbled to bed forgetting to set an alarm. When she woke it was to find Rhys had already left, she was late for work and her husband’s cousin was snoring on her couch.

She had rushed through getting ready, she had been hoping to catch Jack alone that morning to talk to him before the others all arrived, but they were sure to be at the Hub already. She took a perverse pleasure in waking Pugsley just before she left, turning him out of her flat and locking the door behind herself.

She jumped in her car, pulling away at speed heading towards the Plass. She never noticed the wicked grin on Pugsley’s face as he spoke to someone on his phone. If she had she would have been forewarned that her day was not going to go as she planned in any way. Instead she sang along with the radio as she sped towards the Hub. Traffic was a nightmare to begin with, but the closer she got to the Plass the quiter the roads seemed to be. There was an increased police presence in the area though. She wondered what was going on, but at the same time knew that she hadn’t had a phonecall to get her in to work that it mustn’t concern Torchwood. It must be something relatively small time that the police should be able to deal with themselves.

She glared at the officer who stopped her from getting to work. She chewed him out for trying to stop her from going about her business, informing him that she was Torchwood and showing her ID before forcing him to let her through their cordon. She realised once she had parked her car that it may be difficult to just disappear on the invisible lift with so many people sure to be watching her. She should have parked in the garage or by the bay but the walk into the hub from the garage or the tourist office wasn’t exactly the quickest route in to work. It wasn’t like she would have to deal with a parking ticket or anything, her car was registered under Torchwood if anyone was stupid enough to give her a ticket Ianto would deal with it, it was his job after all.

Gwen had got out of her car and had started walking towards the lift when remembered to lock it. She pressed the button on her key fob to lock her car, listening to hear the car lock. Suddenly she was blown off her feet as her car exploded. She put her arms out in front of her to break her fall, but she still managed to hit her head on the ground.

With the large police presence she expected more help than she got. Two officers did rush to her side, but instead of helping her up they started dragging her up and away from her burnt out car, roughly slapping handcuffs on as they did so. Gwen began to kick up a fuss, someone had just tried to kill her, but it was her who was being pushed into the back of a squad car and driven to the station.

Gwen was mortified, being led into the station she used to work at in handcuffs. As she sat in the cell she had been left in she wondered how her morning had gone so wrong. They had breathalysed her on the way to the station, apparently one of the pcs thought she smelled drunk. She was still over the limit from her drinking the night before, so they had added driving under the influence as well as dangerous driving to the charges as well as terrorism.

She couldn’t believe it, someone had tried to blow her up and they were holding her as a terrorist. They hadn’t even questioned her yet, just left her in a cell to rot. When she got out someone’s head was going to roll for this. She wondered were Jack was and why he hadn’t come to get her out yet. She didn’t know how long had gone past before they finally let her out of the cell, but she wasn’t happy. She was even more unhappy when she saw that it was Ianto waiting for her and not Jack, she had assumed the Captain would have come to her rescue and she would get him to herself on the trip back to the Hub.

When Ianto told her that he had managed to stop her from having her driving licence revoked immediately but that she would have to attend court to face her charges she was angry. Her day really had gone completely to hell, the police had released her and explained that the charges of terrorism were being dropped, but she still didn’t know what had happened and who had tried to kill her.

Ianto took her back to her flat instead of the Hub, explaining that she should get some rest before driving off and leaving her stranded without a car as Rhys wasn’t at home. She crawled into bed grumbling about the unfairness of everything, determined to get to the bottom of everything once she had a nap.


	6. Wednesday's Walk

Wednesday wasn’t really in the mood to be playing scare the natives, she had much more important things to be doing. She was spending a lot of time with Owen in the Hub, getting him used to her and getting involved in whatever was going on in the Hub. If she was going to be relocating to Cardiff permanently then she was going to be looking for things to keep her occupied. She had no intention of being a housewife or getting herself a boring job.

She decided to go the easy route to scare the local populace, not really wanting to waste too much time on her attempt. She had been meaning to take Kitty Cat for a walk anyway to get him used to the new area they would be moving to. She had prepared for the walk in advance, borrowing a modified perception filter from Tharmus’ archives to help her get away with her scheme. Cardiff city centre was always full on a Saturday afternoon, so that was when she struck. Lurch had dropped them off before returning to the manor, they would make their own way back later on that evening.

Wednesday made her way to the high street Kitty Cat bounding along beside her letting out happy growls and roars as people gave him a wide berth or let out screams. The modified perception filter meant that she was able to walk alongside her Kitty Cat with no-one any the wiser that she was there. It had been modified though so that technology would still pick her up, so she still showed up on CCTV and other videos or cameras, so it would be shown that she had been escorting him the whole time even if people were to swear he was alone. The general public, the ones not looking at her Kitty Cat through their mobile phone that is, would see Kitty Cat bounding along through the centre of town on his own. That wouldn’t have been much of a problem if her Kitty Cat had been a regular house cat who had started to wander round town. A large lion on the other hand was getting a much larger reaction than say Mr. Tiddles would strolling through town. People were screaming, crying or running away, several shops had stopped admitting customers and had instead barricaded the doors.

Kitty Cat let out a roar of glee and Wednesday scanned their surroundings to see what had caught his attention. When she saw who it was a small smirk graced her face for the slightest of seconds before her expression blanked once more. She watched as Kitty Cat took off running before pouncing on his target. People screamed in fear and a few people fainted, she really couldn’t have planned for this to happen. She wondered if Tharmus had mentioned what she was doing to Aluka or if he had encouraged him to take his wife shopping.

Gwen had for the second time that week been forced to the ground by an external force, and Wednesday had gotten to witness it firsthand this time rather than on CCTV. Gwen was splayed on her back on the floor, while Kitty Cat sat on her growling at her as he butted Aluka’s hand with his head in an attempt to get attention. Taking the perception filter off and sticking it in her pocket she made her way towards her cousin. 

He greeted her with a warm smile as she reached them. “Out for a walk Wednesday?” Aluka asked as he finally gave in and started petting Kitty Cat, not really bothering too much that the lion was sat on his wife. Kitty Cat had sat on pretty much every Addams at some point in the past, it was a good way to learn how to get out from underneath someone stronger than you.

“Just a bit of shopping today.” Wednesday replied. “I was thinking of getting some things for the little monsters, but I haven’t really seen anywhere that will stock what I was going to buy.”

Kitty Cat growled again before roaring in Gwen’s face, the woman was moving about to much and was making a high pitched whining noise. “You are hurting Kitty Cat’s ears Gwen.” Wednesday stated, the woman’s whining to be helped up was grating on her as well. 

Just then Wednesday heard the screeching of tyres and realised that someone had called the police and that they were arriving to deal with the situation. When they started to get out of their cars Wednesday let out a low pitched whistle and Kitty Cat immediately stopped growling at Gwen and began slobbering all over her instead in some strange lion parody of a kiss. Gwen almost howled in anger at being covered in lion drool but Aluka just looked amused, especially when Kitty Cat got a whiff of her perfume and it made him sneeze all over her face. Wednesday let out another small whistle and Kitty Cat backed away from Gwen and took a seat at Wednesday’s feet and started his version of purring.

Like the last time the Cardiff police had met Kitty Cat they were rather nervous and didn’t really know what to do. At least the lion was accompanied this time, someone who they could see had some measure of control over it at least, it was collared and on an extendable dog lead. Wednesday dealt with the situation rather quickly and effectively, explaining to the police that Kitty Cat was her registered therapet. She produced the paperwork proving that he was a service animal, and they had no option but to leave them alone. There wasn’t really much they could do but work to try and calm the public and mutter about strange Americans.

Aluka smiled at Wednesday as people began to emerge slowly from shops, looking at Kitty Cat with trepidation. “I would say you are winning cousin. Is there anything you actually want to shop for around here or was it all just a ruse to come into town.”

“Kitty Cat needed a walk.” Wednesday stated, “I thought I might as well see what shops there were on offer at the same time.”

Aluka chuckled. “Are you being picked up? Or would you like me to drop you off somewhere?”

Gwen began to protest, it was her day off and she wanted Rhys to take her shopping. Seeing an opportunity to annoy Gwen she replied, “That would be most helpful Aluka, if you could drop us by the bay Kitty Cat has a play date.”

Gwen stormed off, informing Aluka that she was going shopping and that he better come back after dropping the girl and her beast off. Wednesday just rolled her eyes at the woman’s dramatics and followed her cousin to his car. She opened the door to the front passenger seat allowing Kitty Cat to climb in before getting in the back. Gwen would no doubt moan about the shed hair on her seat but Wednesday didn’t care, Kitty Cat liked to see where he was going. Aluka hadn’t seemed to mind so she didn’t intend to worry about it, if anything it amused her to imagine how annoyed the other woman would be about it.

It didn’t take them long to get to the bay, Aluka seeming to know every shortcut in the city. Wednesday thanked him and Kitty Cat licked his hand in thanks before they got out the car. They watched Aluka drive off before they headed into the Hub through the tourist office for Kitty Cat’s play date with Myfanwy.


	7. Owen's Observations

When Owen Harper had first met Ianto’s extended family he had realised they were rather kooky. They had after all turned up almost out of nowhere to help them take on a weevil. He wasn’t complaining though, they had been exceptionally helpful that evening. They also hadn’t judged him negatively despite the fact that he was a walking talking corpse. In fact they had been fascinated by him, or rather some of them had.

Owen himself had become fascinated by one of them, so much so that they were actually intending to get married. He hadn’t thought after Katie died that he would ever get hitched but Wednesday drew him like a moth to a flame and he didn’t care if he got burnt. It was interesting to learn what the strange family thought on various topics. Wednesday herself was not a fan of marriage and weddings, but her family had been travelling partially to find her a husband so that others would be able to marry. She had caught the bouquet at her uncle’s wedding and no-one who had been in attendance was able to marry until she had tied the knot. They would marry, but they would also undergo a blood binding as well, something that Wednesday was happy about.

The family were completely different from any other family group that he had ever met. Considering that he worked for Torchwood and had met many aliens that was a rather interesting observation. He had checked with Ianto if there was any alien influence in the family lines but the man had stated that they were all human, just different from most. Their ideas on fun were something to marvel at, Wednesday had explained several of the families’ favourite games to him; Wake the Dead and Scare the Natives just a couple of them.

Owen wasn’t sure what to think of the fact that their idea of fun had ended up with Gwen sitting in a police cell branded a terrorist. He had to admit he did find it an amusing punishment for her parking violations. The fact that no-one was willing to do anything to get her out of the situation Pugsley had landed her in until Ianto started to bitch about the impact her arrest would have on the Institute was mildly alarming. They really didn’t care how they affected her at all, she was just a pawn in Pugsley’s play.

Owen really didn’t care about Gwen either, but more what she represented. She had married into the family, just as he intended to do, but she didn’t seem to accept the family at all and as result hadn’t been accepted by them either. Instead they had made her the main target for their pranks and misfortunes to fall upon. He didn’t know what had made them dislike her the most; her cheating on Rhys and the way she treated him, her disdain for the family that she seemed unable to hide or the fact that she had designs on Jack, the partner of another Addams.

Owen was determined not to make the same mistakes that she had though. He held the family in high regard, he could even say that he respected PC Andy with a straight face these days. He had no ability to cheat on Wednesday at the moment, and he couldn’t see himself straying once they were bonded, he had never cheated when in a committed relationship before he wasn’t about to start after he got married. As for him having any designs on Harkness, that was laughable. Ianto was welcome to him, Jack was much too high maintenance for Owen to cope with for any real period of time outside of work.

Looking up from his tablet, that he had been perusing some test results on before he had been distracted, he heard a growl that could only belong to his fiancé’s pet. Kitty Cat came bounding his way down into the autopsy bay growling out a greeting to him. Owen called a greeting back to him, accepting a chaste kiss on the cheek from Wednesday who had followed Kitty Cat in.

Kitty Cat then let out a loud roar as he jumped onto the autopsy slab. He was joined a few minutes later by Myfanwy who had flown down from her nest and was adding her own squawks to the cacophony of noises in the Hub.

“No making a mess.” Owen warned both predators before taking Wednesday by the hand and leading her out of his domain. “Come on let’s get you some coffee and let them play.”

Ianto with his sixth sense of when the team needed coffee just directed them towards the conference room, telling Toshiko to join them, and that he would be up with coffee in a minute. Jack was already there, sat at the head of the table on the phone clearly ignoring most of what the person on the other end was saying. When he spoke it was obvious to Owen straight away who he was speaking to.

“That’s something you need to fix with Kitty Cat yourself. He’s done nothing unwarranted at all, and even if he had it wouldn’t be down to me to sort your problems for you.” Jack rolled his eyes, a smile appearing on his face as Ianto came in behind them carrying a tray of coffees. “I need to go Gwen, Owen’s here with that report on the blowfishes stomach contents.” He then hung up before she could say anything else. He then turned to Wednesday who was trying and failing to look innocent. “Enjoy your walk?”

Wednesday just smirked. “Kitty Cat seemed to enjoy himself. I found the shops rather lacking, there wasn’t an ammunition or munitions shop in sight.”

Owen looked at his fiancé as Jack and Ianto chuckled. Ianto used the plasma screen to bring up a video that had gone viral already of Kitty Cat accosting Gwen as people screamed and cowered in barricaded shops. He didn’t know what to say, he was amused by Gwen’s plight but a bit speechless by how much panic Wednesday had managed to cause with so little effort. Normally the Cardiff natives were a lot hardier, with a rift in time and space running through the city they had been subjected to a lot of odd things.

At a loud roar from his domain he grabbed the remote from Ianto pulling up the internal CCTV. None of them were expecting the strange game of tag that appeared to be playing out on the screen in front of them. From Kitty Cat’s roar it appeared that Myfanwy was winning. Owen smiled as he inhaled his last sniff of his coffee before giving it over to Jack who had already finished his. It almost seemed as if the rest of the team were rushing their coffee these days to be the one to get the cup that Ianto still made for him even if he couldn’t drink it.

A squawk followed by a whining noise from Kitty Cat had them turning back to the screen to see Myfanwy circling above Kitty Cat and occasionally hitting him with a wing. As Ianto left the room to go and chastise the pterodactyl Owen chuckled, this was his family as mad and as weird as they come, but unlike Gwen he wouldn’t change anything about them.


End file.
